


Heart and Soul

by AzureAshes875



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Brother/Brother Incest, Freeform, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-25
Updated: 2019-02-01
Packaged: 2019-10-16 05:09:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17543285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AzureAshes875/pseuds/AzureAshes875
Summary: Lets go back to the Beginning; Where connections are more than what they seem, allowing two to become one. When dark forces come forward and try to sever their bond; it will take everything the brothers have to hold onto each other; and those who fight with them. Is set in Cannon but will diverge. Wincest.





	1. Heart and Soul

**Author's Note:**

> I know we are in season 14. I wrote this story back in 2012, and for some reason have clung to it. It is revised and diverges after season 3. It will follow certain episodes, before I diverge. this story is more about the spiritual connection between Sam and Dean and a little bit with J2. Before I wrote this, I studied the boys in Character and out of Character. These are my observations with a little fan girling in between. This is primarily Wincest, with a slow burn; please skip over if its not for you. Lets go back to the beginning, 
> 
> Gentle feedback is so so appreciated. Enjoy.

**_Chapter 1: Seems So_ **

* * *

**_"Wither your footsteps are behind me_ **

**_Or your ghost is on the wall,_ **

**_You know just where to find me_ **

**_When the light begins to fall." Loner_ **

* * *

 

Each move was tentative, slow. Painstakingly and beautifully slow. Isn't that how it was supposed to be? 

 

After years of being apart, each move was a chess piece that needed to be carefully placed. Each step gingerly beginning to bridge the distance between the two of them.

 

They were immersed in this; this bond that formed within them. It surrounded their every thought, move, action. This tie-in bound them for life, for after life, before they had come onto Earth.

 

The supernatural had given them something rare; powerful enough it trumped everything else.

* * *

Even while he was at college, Sam felt his brother. There would be days when he could have sworn that Dean was leaning against the wall, sitting in the room with him; whispering in his ear.

 

Even as he lay in bed next to Jessica, he could hear his brother's heart beat in his head, if he focused by picturing Dean’s face; he could feel Dean’s presence.

 

His strong, pure warmth that was everything Dean; an essence that beat inside him. Sam had drawn the conclusion one night that he couldn't be without Dean. It was as if his brother was the soul, the core of  Sam’s entire being; his existence resting on Dean being alive. He tethered him, kept him together, and even though they were apart; he ground him.

 

Sam wasn't surprised when Dean had pinned him that night. When the powerful jolt of hazel meeting emerald green, entwined their breath, circled the air; made his heart stop beating for a moment. In that one simple moment, Sam's spirit filled with Love; consuming, passionate, soft.

 

This bond thickened between them, each heartbeat became louder in their ears, each brother memorizing everything they saw in the other. Colors, lights, sounds, disappeared. Time stood still, and it was just them.

 

Broken, pained, angered, magnificently them.

 

For one second, they were one. Each one whole, each one not needing anything else.

 

Had the lights not come on, they would have stayed, just simply stayed. Getting lost in each other, in the sweet auras that burnt and blended them together, melded each heart and soul so that's all they could feel.

 

If Jessica hadn't said Sam's name, perhaps they would have gotten skin to skin, trying to be ever closer than before, trying to become one within one; cause sometimes skin isn't close enough.

 

By the time Sam had gotten to her; the moments were forgotten; forced into the back of the mind  for a time being, each brother in denial over what they felt.

 

_ “Dads on a hunting trip, and hasn’t been back for a few days.”  _

* * *

Time doesn't allow denial to run for long, Fate has her own plans.

 

Each move had to be perfect, each motion the right step….


	2. Lullaby of a Dark Night

**_Chapter 2: Lullaby of a Dark Night_ **

* * *

**_"Please let me take you_ **

**_Out of the darkness and into the light_ **

**_'Cause I have faith in you_ **

**_That you're gonna make it through another night_ **

**_Stop thinking about the easy way out_ **

**_There's no need to go and blow the candle out_ **

**_Because you're not done_ **

**_You're far too young_ **

**_And the best is yet to come" Lullaby-Nickel Back_ **

* * *

Whenever they thought about losing each other, it was like a wrench in the gut. The sick twisted pull of a jagged knife from the heart to the belly. It affected each of them differently, but the moment was the same, an erratic piercing that went through their entire being.

Dean would be sitting in a bar, trying to hit on the next beautiful woman that walked by. Just as he reached out to touch them, he would feel Sam. Sam would flow in his veins. The way he looked, the smell of the musk he wore after taking a hot steamy shower.

He closed his eyes one night, drinking some whiskey in a dive in some bo dunk town. He allowed himself this one moment, this experiment; in a dark corner of the noise. He could hear the crack of pool tables, the sound of laughter and clinking glasses.

In an instant, all of that would drain away; Sam would become clear in his mind. As if his little brother was sitting next to him, smirking or rolling his eyes. Dean could never tell what he was doing, just that he was alright. He had come to enjoy those little moments; where he didn't have to deny this incessant pull; a crazy instinct to just be close; to know that Sam was his heart.

When he would open his eyes again, reality would sink in; the noises and crazy sounds of everything smashing together. Dean would find himself wishing for silence, for the quiet of Sams breathing; for his hotel room.

 

Time doesn't allow for denial, neither does the Supernatural…

* * *

The first time it had occurred, it would be Sam's secret to hold. He was pinned up against a wall, watching as the yellowed eyed demon crushed each one of Dean's organs slowly. The monster had possessed the body of their father; and was having no trouble torturing his son.

Sam could feel his brother's pain; almost as if they were the same person. Every internal body part crushed, Sam could feel. He had begged and pleaded, asked for mercy. He would hear Dean beg Dad not to kill him; that he still needed to be there for Sam.

Sam knew that if Dean died, Sam would to. The only person ever there in his life, the only one that came back for him, that loved him to a depth had never known. He was Sam's soul, Sam's entire reason for existence.

As if lightning had cracked, agony stopped. He was dropped down to the ground; crawling over to Dean; holding him as if he were to turn to ash in his hands. He began kissing the blood from his wounds as his brother spit up his organs, his being. Each bloodied cough; each "Sam, Sammy." would wrench the young Winchesters heart.

It was in the hospital, while John ran off into dark regions that Sam sat at his brother's side. He knew that Dean didn't have long to live, that he would lose him, lose the soul that was part of him.

He reached out and ran his hand along Deans, memorizing the feel of the knuckles that had thrown punches at him, pinned him against walls, and scraped the hair out of his eyes. He would talk softly, quietly, telling Dean how much he loved him, how much he needed to stay.

Once his fingers touched the silken cold skin, Sam knew that he wouldn't be able to stop. The urge to trace every skin line, every scar; would become so difficult it would be painful to pull away. His hands found their way up to Dean's face, tracing the form; memorizing the shape.

Sam's strong hands cupped his face; with one hand resting on his face, another on Dean's chest; Sam would feel his brother's shallow heartbeats; breathe with him; in the same moment. He thought if maybe they could feel this, then he could bring Dean to life, or pray that something would bring him home…

* * *

A trade of all trades. A life for a life. A deal for a deal. It had been to save Dean, to keep Dean alive for Sammy. Dean was unaware of this, only that he was alive and shouldn't be. Only that when Dean awoke, his brother was there, hand clasping his.

His father was there, smiling sadly; giving Dean a sense of wrong...of a not rightness in him; that He, Dean; didn’t belong somehow.

He didn't remember anything of his comatose state, until Sam had touched his shoulder. His touch ignited Dean's skin, and he could feel Sam's hands on his face; on his chest; feel his breathing match his own.

 

“Dean, are you okay?" Sam's warm voice melted over Dean in waves that gave him chills; he would just look at Sam, unable to say anything, just take in the loving concern on his little brothers face.

He would swallow, choke; and shrug the hand off; nonchalant, denying any feeling that could exist.

* * *

John's funeral was dark for all of them. A hunters burial, burn and salt the bones; give the spirit time to move on, to be cleansed.

Dean couldn't think, was numb, tired and cold. All he wanted to do was kill the son of a Bitch that killed his father; that took him away too soon. They were just becoming a family again.

Sam's strong arms slipped around his brother's waist, holding him back against his chest. It was the only reality that Dean felt; the only thing he craved to feel; in a smattering of years since the beginning; Sam’s being was all Dean clung to.

Their grief was one. They shared the same pain, shared the same guilt. It slithered through each of them, a snake ready to strike when hostility raised its head with testosterone and a few beers.

Frozen in time, with the fires of their father's funeral pyre burning into the night, they rested against each other; feeling whole and grief stricken at once. There was a tender kiss placed on Dean's temple; gentle words of "I'm here, big brother."

Sam hadn't thought, neither one had. He had just reacted to the same grief stricken power he felt from his brother, the same loss of a part of them that was now one with the powers that be.

They lay there that night, holding each other; tears streaming down their faces; as their father became ashes in front of them. In the morning, they wouldn't talk, they would push down and bury the feelings, hunt out their grief.

* * *

Powers beyond knowing didn't allow for denial. The moves were set into place, chess pieces along the board; when the right time came; the boys would be in the right place...two souls to be crushed in a lullaby of a dark night.

**Author's Note:**

> There is chapter 1. Let me know what you think.


End file.
